Do Dummies Dream of Electric Bricks?

January 15, 2022

Photos by Ryan Mettz.

Video by Max Hull.

Words and interview by Max Palmer.

Do Dummies Dream of Electric Bricks?

So it’s about 1:30 a.m. I’m pretty buzzed, leaving a party at Robert DeNiro’s house in the West Village. I get on my bike, ride three feet and snap – the handle bars no longer work. Of course I decide to power through it and attempt to ride back anyway. This thing has already been a piece of shit for months now, maybe years. It’s rickety as hell. The brakes barely work, and now the handlebars don’t turn. It was the worst and most frustrating bike ride of my life. It took me at least an hour and a half to get back to Brooklyn. I ditch the bike in the studio and it sits there for a while…

At some point Ryan and I get the idea that it would be funny to ghost ride the bike off a cliff and film it for the video. After weeks of talking about how we should do this, we still haven’t. Then, to make it harder on ourselves, we think it would be good to put a dummy on the bike. Next thing I know, I have a balloon and I’m making a paper mache head out of a ripped up Skate Jawn. This dummy head is so fucked looking but somehow kinda looks like me, so I take some old clothes and stuff them with backdrop paper I found in the dumpster area. This dummy is just sprawled out on the floor of the studio for a month or two, successfully scaring the shit out of me, and everyone else, every time we go in there. Sean told me he actually thought it was me the first time he saw it and was trying to ask it some questions with no response. Then we are thinking: “Oh man, how sick would it be to get a skate photo of the dummy? with a fake sequence…”

A few days later we find ourselves driving around with the dummy sitting shotgun, and me in the back dressed the same as the dummy. People are breaking their necks looking at us in shock, confusion, disgust, who knows. Finding a skate spot where we could rig it up was equally challenging, but somehow we got lucky and picked a spot with a bunch of little pipes on the wall where I was able to wire the dummy up. We are getting some crazy looks from people driving down Flushing as I run across traffic carrying a limp stunt double of myself.

At some point during all these months of commotion I had the idea to expand the bike cliff jump into a little skit. There has been a long running “joke” where I’m always trying to persuade people to bike/skate to ConEd while maybe or maybe not taking shrooms. Stu and I got the closest one bleak winter day at Willoughby when we were about to skate the 8.7 mile trek, but we were dissuaded by the crew walking into the house with 6-packs and telling us we were crazy. This seemed like a great basis for the skit. We had skated ConEd recently, and in classic form, I took a fall that was later dubbed the “Cake Devastation.”

Somehow, with my cake and psyche devastated I realized that this was perfect thing to base the skit around. The screenplay started taking shape. However, Ryan and I soon realized that this project was spiraling out of our control and we were going to need some professional help to actually pull it off. Luckily, Max Hull was down! I took him to Coyote Club and gave him the pitch of my life with a hand-drawn storyboard and everything. I think he was skeptical at first, but who could blame him. So originally this was supposed to be a lil’ skit that Ryan and I would just go out and film one afternoon, but this hairball idea turned into a full-on film shoot with a ZipCar, production assistants, a cameo by Franco, and original music and sound design. I remember asking Max Hull after we shot it if he thought people would “get it” and he kinda just laughed and said something like “I didn’t know people were supposed to get it.” Anyway, I hope you all like it, and I just want to give special thanks to Max Hull and everyone that helped work on it, couldn’t have done it without you!

-Max Palmer

Do you wanna go to ConEd?

Marcus: I’m good.

Max Hull: I never really mind going to ConEd personally.

Mettz: Personally, I have no desire to go to ConEd, but I am down.

Nik: Absolutely not.

Chuck Palmer: Hell yeah I want to go to ConEd!

Franco: I was just trying to plug into my granny’s grave to rock out and then the guys drove by.

Do you remember any good pedestrian reactions when seeing the dummy?

Max Hull: Could have had some great ones if we left him in the water a little longer.

Mettz: I remember when we had it back tailing the Flushing steps, so many people stopped to take photos of it. I always wondered what those people thought was going on.

Any funny memories from the shoot day?

Max Hull: Basically any time the dummy had to be set up in a position was hilarious. Also just seeing Max side by side with the dummy was amazing. At the first location (ConEd), we had just shot the first few shots of the day and Max crushed the side of the dummy’s head by accident. That was a close call.

Mettz: There was a whole squad of cops staking out some fool who got caught painting the water tower in Greenpoint the night before, it was a standoff for like 12 hours.

Nik: At the exact time of the shoot there was some police activity down the street. I believe they were staking out someone that was hiding in a water tower since the night before. Pretty serious business. Officers and pedestrians were huddled around looking up at the tower, some taking photos, and there we were trying to ghost ride a bike with a dummy on the same block.

Were you sad to see the dummy go?

Marcus: Been missing the dummy since it left the studio. It made great company.

Mettz: He had a lot of potential.

Nik: No, I miss the dummy.

Chuck Palmer: I was sad to see the dummy go, but I somehow knew it would survive…

Why did this happen?

Marcus: Max had a bike he needed to get rid of, so he did this.

Max Hull: Max had a vision that he felt needed to be realized.

Mettz: Only because it had to.

Nik: Everything happens for a reason.

Chuck Palmer: This happened in order to raise awareness about the skate spot gem that is ConEd.

Do you think they made it to ConEd?

Marcus: Maybe ConEd is a state of mind.

Max Hull: The world may never know.

Mettz: The journey is only what matters.

Nik: I hope not.

Did you have any idea what you were getting yourself into?

Nik: No I thought we were going to Verizon Banks.

Were any fatal mistakes made?

Max Hull: Mitchell not being in the skit.

Mettz: Never.

How many times did the dummy scare you?

Marcus: Every time you saw it in the studio, people would think it was a person or Max.

Mettz: While it was in the studio pretty much every time I looked at it. And when it was in the back of the car, that was a whole different fucked up mental experience. Double Max in the whip.

Chuck Palmer: The dummy scared me both never and every time.

What was your favorite part of the process and why?

Marcus: Watching the dummy creation, and brainstorming how and why to ghost ride it into the river was the best. And watching the dummy scare people at the studio.

Max Hull: The shoot day was a blast. Felt like when I used to make videos with homies in college. If any friend ever wants to shoot something I’m always down!

Mettz: I’ll never forget seeing it fly through the air looking through the viewfinder of my camera, it happened in slow motion and it was the most epic thing i’ve ever seen

Nik: The final launch was fantastic. Mitchell brought the whole crew in the van for the viewing party. The sun was setting over beautiful Maspeth. A perfect ending to a perfect day.

Least favorite part of the process and why?

Max Hull: Trying to make it make sense in the edit.

Mettz: Realizing we had to get the dummy out of the creek after Franco had bashed its face in with a rock. I didn’t think we would be able to get it out and that creek is nasty, I don’t really like being near it.

Nik: I think this was filmed on one of the hottest days of the summer. Still drank a hot coffee though.

Who wrote this movie?

Max Hull: Micheal Bay.

Chuck Palmer: Didn’t this movie come from the story of the Greek God ConEd?

What was the hardest part?

Max Hull: Filming the dummies hands on the bike. I had to ride switch and get the camera in between the arms while Max was pushing the bike out of frame. One take my board hit the front tire and we all almost went down.

Nik: Trying to catch the dummy ghost riding on the bike. Not as easy as it sounds. Quite a few shinners.

Chuck Palmer: Not yet having been to ConEd.

Do you think people “get it”? Do you “get it” ?

Max Hull: As Max told me from the very start – it’s not supposed to make total sense.

Mettz: If you know, you know.

Nik: If you’ve skated ConEd you will get it.

Chuck Palmer: The people who get this movie will be forever changed by it. I got it. I know I got it because I am forever changed.

Do you know, will there be a sequel?

Marcus: Maybe next time Max has to get rid of something?

Max Hull: Hope so!

Mettz: I know for a fact.

Nik: Yes. Rumor has it he survived the fall into the toxic river and swam to shore. Alive but severely disfigured.

Chuck Palmer: I do think there will be a fair amount of pressure from the fans for a sequel. It’s all about the shareholders, and what the Gods have to say about it.